50 Shades is the Classic Fairytale Storyline

     The number one thing that people always get "twisted up" about (yes that's a bondage joke) when discussing 50 Shades of Grey is the BDSM elements. I've seen so many comments about it portraying a emotionally abusive relationship and that's perpetuating negative types of relationships. Let me just say this : 50 Shades of Grey follows a very similar storyline as ALL classic princess movies. How can you get more worked up about this film then a girl getting locked in a dungeon and then slowly over time giving up her whole life for her captor. This first came into my realm of awareness after watching my friend Alex Clark's hilarious animated video: 50 Shades of Beauty and the Beast

Opinions from someone who has never read/seen the story

      Now lets backtrack just a little bit. I must admit I read only about 50 pages...truly 50 ;) of the first book and it didn't really turn me on so to speak perhaps my taste are "more singular" -God I hope these movie references and puns are funny to someone reading this. Mostly because as a sapiosexual I NEED good writing in order to be stimulated and that dare I say that garbage didn't quite do the trick. None the less as all the billboards in LA tantalized me Curious? I slowly became more so and that damn sexy trailer too. I admit that I was everything this pr/marketing team wanted their ideal demographic so to speak.

      So when my coworker and I had the day off for President day we decided to go. I know this will be an unpopular sentiment but... really our reaction to the girl's choice is the problem in all of this. Here's some reasons
1- He says from the beginning "I don't do romance" and I don't date, sleep in any one's bed etc but yet Anastasia still thinks she'll change him/win him over and he'll change. He's being very upfront and clear about what he's emotionally capable of and how he lives his life and yet she still in every scene tries to change that.
2- ALL the other girls who he had this arrangement with seemingly agreed to the lifestyle willingly (although not reading the series I can't be certain on this). No one was "forced" into anything. The contract actually makes the relationship more defined and structured then in most common every day scenarios where you're wondering around in labeless confusion getting unsolicited dick pics and wondering what the hell kind of setup your in.
3- She buys into being wooed,although somewhat begrudgingly, and accepts ALL OF the lavish gifts he imparts on her. She lets herself be won over by his planes, tuxes, lifestyle, apartment, etc. Her life was fairly boring like Belle and then a stranger creates a new and exciting world that they are all to eager to join and get swept up in.
4- There really is only a guise of her being independent and making decisions based on her needs aka a few changes in the contract etc. She allows herself to follow the predetermined rules and does so of her own will and understanding.
   

There are lots more of these celebrity gifs out there 50 Shades of Fey was my 2nd favorite

      Another point that just needs to be thrown in here is that in real life BDSM couple 2 adult people are mutually agreeing to conduct themselves by certain rules and behaviors. It depends on ABSOLUTE trust,faith, and safety. No one is being manipulated or pushed into that kind of lifestyle. SO the idea that these people are emotionally abusing their partners is so far from the true intent of the practice. I work with people in domestic abuse scenarios every day and that's true manipulation not this movie.

       So getting back to the Princess point. Girl lives mundane life- meets interesting stranger- is curious and intrigued- wants to see what his life is all about- willing to leave everything she knows for boy- does so. Is that not The Little Mermaid in a Nutshell?!?! Or Beauty and the Beast just take away the details and it's all the same. The girls are swept up in the fantasy of the man's world and willingly enter into it whether the change is from the ocean to land or small live to lavish portland city life. They all seem self sufficient and independent but in reality are just looking to be swept away into a life beyond their wildest dreams the only difference is a castle vs penthouse.
 

It's quoted around the internet as being IN THE NOVEL!

    I've wrote about modern America 20 somethings Princess Delusions before (This is from when I was 25 and wow my writing has come so far). It's a theme that has a continuous undercurrent in my life as someone who struggles to be completely independent of needing a man and the longing of wanting a long term partner. There are moments when I think what it would be like to date a CEO or find a guy traveling the world who will turn out to be a Prince of some small country I've never heard of. More so I dream of a regency era gentleman who asks me to dance and take a turn around the garden. I let myself go there briefly it's easy to get swept up in that as your ongoing narrative. I have been fighting it every day since I realized I want to live in the real world more then one of my own creation- that's not easy for an actress, whose a lucid dreamer, and has a wildly imaginative brain.
“Sometimes I wonder if there's something wrong with me. Perhaps I've spent too long in the company of my literary romantic heroes, and consequently my ideals and expectations are far too high.”
― E.L. James, Fifty Shades of Grey  

      So I just ask people to consider what is it that really bothers them about 50 Shades of Grey? The bondage in the first film is not very explicit eyes masks, ice cubes, limbs ties to the bed, there's only one scene where she begs him to "show her the worst"  which he does and she hates. As long as people are being safe and consensual I would never enter into judgement about their sexual habits. What I think really bothers people is that this is another tale of yet another women choosing to be swept up in the Princess world. By letting him call all the shots and giving up all her power. It's twisted and needs to be corrected yes but then you shouldn't dress up your child in Princess costumes and tell them to wait for their white knight either.

Just for one last chuckle!