50 Shades is the Classic Fairytale Storyline

     The number one thing that people always get "twisted up" about (yes that's a bondage joke) when discussing 50 Shades of Grey is the BDSM elements. I've seen so many comments about it portraying a emotionally abusive relationship and that's perpetuating negative types of relationships. Let me just say this : 50 Shades of Grey follows a very similar storyline as ALL classic princess movies. How can you get more worked up about this film then a girl getting locked in a dungeon and then slowly over time giving up her whole life for her captor. This first came into my realm of awareness after watching my friend Alex Clark's hilarious animated video: 50 Shades of Beauty and the Beast

Opinions from someone who has never read/seen the story

      Now lets backtrack just a little bit. I must admit I read only about 50 pages...truly 50 ;) of the first book and it didn't really turn me on so to speak perhaps my taste are "more singular" -God I hope these movie references and puns are funny to someone reading this. Mostly because as a sapiosexual I NEED good writing in order to be stimulated and that dare I say that garbage didn't quite do the trick. None the less as all the billboards in LA tantalized me Curious? I slowly became more so and that damn sexy trailer too. I admit that I was everything this pr/marketing team wanted their ideal demographic so to speak.

      So when my coworker and I had the day off for President day we decided to go. I know this will be an unpopular sentiment but... really our reaction to the girl's choice is the problem in all of this. Here's some reasons
1- He says from the beginning "I don't do romance" and I don't date, sleep in any one's bed etc but yet Anastasia still thinks she'll change him/win him over and he'll change. He's being very upfront and clear about what he's emotionally capable of and how he lives his life and yet she still in every scene tries to change that.
2- ALL the other girls who he had this arrangement with seemingly agreed to the lifestyle willingly (although not reading the series I can't be certain on this). No one was "forced" into anything. The contract actually makes the relationship more defined and structured then in most common every day scenarios where you're wondering around in labeless confusion getting unsolicited dick pics and wondering what the hell kind of setup your in.
3- She buys into being wooed,although somewhat begrudgingly, and accepts ALL OF the lavish gifts he imparts on her. She lets herself be won over by his planes, tuxes, lifestyle, apartment, etc. Her life was fairly boring like Belle and then a stranger creates a new and exciting world that they are all to eager to join and get swept up in.
4- There really is only a guise of her being independent and making decisions based on her needs aka a few changes in the contract etc. She allows herself to follow the predetermined rules and does so of her own will and understanding.
   

There are lots more of these celebrity gifs out there 50 Shades of Fey was my 2nd favorite

      Another point that just needs to be thrown in here is that in real life BDSM couple 2 adult people are mutually agreeing to conduct themselves by certain rules and behaviors. It depends on ABSOLUTE trust,faith, and safety. No one is being manipulated or pushed into that kind of lifestyle. SO the idea that these people are emotionally abusing their partners is so far from the true intent of the practice. I work with people in domestic abuse scenarios every day and that's true manipulation not this movie.

       So getting back to the Princess point. Girl lives mundane life- meets interesting stranger- is curious and intrigued- wants to see what his life is all about- willing to leave everything she knows for boy- does so. Is that not The Little Mermaid in a Nutshell?!?! Or Beauty and the Beast just take away the details and it's all the same. The girls are swept up in the fantasy of the man's world and willingly enter into it whether the change is from the ocean to land or small live to lavish portland city life. They all seem self sufficient and independent but in reality are just looking to be swept away into a life beyond their wildest dreams the only difference is a castle vs penthouse.
 

It's quoted around the internet as being IN THE NOVEL!

    I've wrote about modern America 20 somethings Princess Delusions before (This is from when I was 25 and wow my writing has come so far). It's a theme that has a continuous undercurrent in my life as someone who struggles to be completely independent of needing a man and the longing of wanting a long term partner. There are moments when I think what it would be like to date a CEO or find a guy traveling the world who will turn out to be a Prince of some small country I've never heard of. More so I dream of a regency era gentleman who asks me to dance and take a turn around the garden. I let myself go there briefly it's easy to get swept up in that as your ongoing narrative. I have been fighting it every day since I realized I want to live in the real world more then one of my own creation- that's not easy for an actress, whose a lucid dreamer, and has a wildly imaginative brain.
“Sometimes I wonder if there's something wrong with me. Perhaps I've spent too long in the company of my literary romantic heroes, and consequently my ideals and expectations are far too high.”
― E.L. James, Fifty Shades of Grey  

      So I just ask people to consider what is it that really bothers them about 50 Shades of Grey? The bondage in the first film is not very explicit eyes masks, ice cubes, limbs ties to the bed, there's only one scene where she begs him to "show her the worst"  which he does and she hates. As long as people are being safe and consensual I would never enter into judgement about their sexual habits. What I think really bothers people is that this is another tale of yet another women choosing to be swept up in the Princess world. By letting him call all the shots and giving up all her power. It's twisted and needs to be corrected yes but then you shouldn't dress up your child in Princess costumes and tell them to wait for their white knight either.

Just for one last chuckle!

British Boys/Men Beyond Babeilicious

         Here is a comprehensive list of the most amazing beyond babeilicious boys and men (see section 2) who hail from the great island of Britannia. It is no secret if you know me you know I have a super serious weakness for British accents, well all EU accents but especially theirs. Feel free to swoon, drool, or ogle to you hearts content. Order does not pertain to likeability...

The Under 35ers - The Boys
Henry Cavill: 30, Jersey Channel Island, Newly attached like it became official this week
Henry recently has skyrocketed to popularity with the release of "Man of Steel" his abs "steal" the screen. I however fell in love when he played the playboy Charles Brandon in "The Tudors". I mean shirtless, in the ruffled white shirts, or all dolled up in period costume his presence kept me watching all 4 seasons. My love deepened in his small bit part in Stardust as the secret gay man. I would go anywhere and do anything with him.

Eddie Redmayne: 31, London, Attached
I first got my love dose of Eddie in "My Week with Marilyn" He's been in 2 versions of Queen Elizabeth movies and why not he's that talented! Just when you think there's no way he could be more adorable you find out that boy can really sing. In "Les Miserables" his voice and puppy dog love for Cosette is precious and completely swoon worthy.

Robert Pattinson: 27, London, Single? bye bye Kstew
Sure sure ya he's that guy from twilight but before that he was Cedric in "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire". There was one moment when flying on a broom chasing those bird/ball things (any muggles want to tell me the name of those?!?) when he raises his head up and stares into the camera I think I was about 18 and squealed. I told my mom that one day he would be famous (point me) boy did I call that one! Maybe it's the hair or those oh so chiseled cheek bones- I don't care if that pale disgusting makeup makes him look dead he is still hot.

Jim Sturgess: 35, London/Surrey, Attached
Most people know Jim as the card counting MIT student in "21". I however am obsessed with Jim as Jude in "Across the Universe." Again there is singing and romance and he just looks so damn amazing getting angry singing Revolution totally worth illegally living in the country for. A bit of an ass in "One Day" he more them redeems him self as several characters in "Cloud Atlas" when I proclaimed "That is so Jim I would know those eyes anywhere!" no mask or makeup can fool me from spotting this hottie.

Aaron Taylor-Johnson: 23, High Wycomb, Married
I almost feel bad for liking this boy at 23 although he is more man then most boys his age also married to someone double his age! Aaron first blew my mind as the creative and slightly disturbed Lennon in "Nowhere Boy." When he took on the Russian adulterous soldier Vronsky in "Anna Karenia" he made me want to run away with him. Sure he's young, sure he's married to a women who could easily be his mom, he is still lovely.

Joseph Morgan: 32, Wales, Single Maybe Attached
The first time I set eyes on Joseph was as William Price in "Mansfield Park" short but sweet role. It wasn't until his ongoing stint at Klaus in "Vampire Diaries" that I really fell. He's twisted yet thoughtful, a hidden artist, and killer= complex to say the least. No one likes a simple man and he's proving to be a chameleon like actor that I simply can't get enough of.

The Over 35ers- The Men

Hugh Grant: 53, Hammersmith, Single
Oh come on does he even need a descriptor?!?! Bridget Jones, Love Actually, Notting Hill, Two weeks Notice, and as Edward in Sense and Sensibility ( I really really can't get enough of men dressed in period costumes) he is dashing in all of them. Throughout the years he has done some pretty questionable things- anyone remember the transvestite (not judging just commenting)? But with a quick smile and sarcastic comment all is forgiven he's too cute to hate for long even as the douchy cheating Daniel Clever he can always charm his way back to love.

Colin Firth: 53 Grayshott, Married
Another one who needs no description. A man whose played Darcy in period accurate clothing (in that infamous white shirt) to a modern version of the same character in "Bridget Jones's Diary" that boyish charm is to precious and he's been married to his wife for ages, a very sexy quality. This man just seems to get better and better with age! Oh ya the "King's Speech" was pretty much a masterpiece of acting- did I mention he can sing to mamma mia he's amazing.

Jude Law: 41, Lewisham, Divorced
The British bad boy you don't want to love but you really just can't help it... bad for his wives good for us. He's been in 52 imbd credited and movies- yes 52 I just counted! I like him for one of the most ridiculous movies he ever made- Alfie - haven't seen it? well no one else has either. It doesn't even matter whether he takes on the heartthrob or the weird creepy guy he masters it all.

Matthew Macfadyen:39, Norfolk, Married
Another Darcy makes this list. A more sensitive take in the film he did an amazing as Mr Darcy in "Pride and Prejudice" (sexy, reserved britishness is paramount for that role). He also used that same skill set to excel in "Anna Karenina" and "Little Dorrit." He is softer and loveable and oh so adorable as Logan Mountstewart in the mini series "Any Human Heart" what can't he do? Not sure I still can't find anything.

Here is a list of films that contain more then 1 of these babeilicious Brits including:
 Bridget Jone's Diary
 Bridget Jones Edge of Reason
 Anna Karenia
 Cloud Atlas
 Love Actually
 Immortals

Memory Removal

Have you ever thought about what it would be like to completely erase someone from your mind? I'm talking complete no existence Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind Style gone from your memory. As a tagline from the movie poster says: You can erase someone from your mind. Getting them out of your heart is another story. I use to think that everything teaches you something and that you should never wish to forget any part of your life because it makes who you are. Now i'm inclined to reconsider... maybe somethings just are to painful to recall. I don't mean that you can't overcome them but just that it would be easier if you didn't have to. If given the chance like in the movie would you remove someone from your memory???

In 2025 I'll Be...

Today my curious thought while brushing my teeth was where will I be in 2025 and what will I be doing? Why 2025 you ask?? Well that is the estimated year I will have re paid my student loan on a happier note i'll be 38 and be well established in my adulthood. I just finished watching the Masterpiece theater 4 part mini series Any Human Heart which is a book written by an author about a fake author via "his diaries." The Book/Film cover this whole man's life and they really hammer in the continuity and themes ones goes through throughout their life. So I allowed myself a temporary lapse in only focusing on the present to hypothesize about what my future existence will be like in 13 years. I will be an actress hopefully in features but also doing side indie projects where I can act my own script or direct/act like Zach Braft. I hope to have a partner someone who is sharing my life equally and always going on adventures with me. By 2025 I hope I have been to Alaska, Hawaii, Greece, Australia, Germany, and Japan and had my travel journals published into a book. I will have one love song, novel, and poem dedicated to me. I will have the kinds of friends who have been there for me almost 4 decades of my life and remember all the fights and the good times. My family will be even larger because I'm sure by that time all my girls cousins will have several kids. I will be living in one the beach towns out here so I can see the ocean every morning and fall asleep to crashing waves every night. Maybe I'll even be pregnant with one adopted child and a set of twins of my own. My home will be filled with pictures and treasures I have collected from around the world. My bed will have a frame and not be on the floor along with a closet that will contain all of my shoes. I will have inspired people to follow their dream and have entertained them in the process. I would have contributed to society in away that is beneficial and helpful to future generations. I will have lived my days truthfully and gratefully full of appreciation and wonder...sounds good to me 2025 here I come ~S~

The Oscars from an LA perspective

This photo does not do the moment justice!

Since as long as I can remember I have always wanted to be an actress. The movie Honey I Shrunk the Kids was one of my childhood favorites (non cartoon) and I wanted to be Amy badly.  I thought "I could do that one day" and spent many afternoons reenacting the film around my house. Since that moment 20 or so years ago I have wanted to be a film actress more then I have ever wanted anything in life. Any major step or decision was made with that goal in mind theater summer camps,performing arts high school, theater degree etc. I knew one day if I ever wanted to be a film actress I would have to move to LA. Well many steps later I arrived in Los Angeles on October 11th 2011. It's been a little over 5 months and I am still continually in awe that I am even here. Sure I have only been on one audition I need more head shots, a reel, and contacts but hey I am here so that is one step closer then I was a year ago! Then it was the night of the Oscars. I have watched the Academy Awards Show religiously for many years and I could feel the energy all around town and all the roadblocks as well adding time to go anywhere in Hollywood. I actually had to work at the store so I was going to be missing the majority of the show. A friend asked "what is it like being in LA for the Oscars?" I responded "Annoying and trafficey." After work I had to grocery store so not considering where I needed to go I went my normal route..... well when I reached Sunset I started to see all these cops and road blocks I immediately panicked. I heard stories of immigrations stops where they check everyone for licenses and Cali registration....I had neither... I didn't have $1,000 to pay the fine either. I felt an anxiety attack coming but there was no way out of the line....then up ahead I saw sky lights and the vanity fair party signs. I let out a deep sigh of relief there were about 15 news vans and a few random people going in (it was still early only 8). After my shopping I made it home in time to see the last 3 awards Best Actress, Actor, and Movie. Once the broadcast was over my roommate noticed all the sky lights outside our window. It was an enchanting light display in the night sky. It looked like 12 dancing faeries or something- I almost cried. I could feel the energy and the excitement of the Oscars it felt so close and yet so far. I text my friend and said I change my answer- The Oscars in LA are magical. ~S~