In 2025 I'll Be...

Today my curious thought while brushing my teeth was where will I be in 2025 and what will I be doing? Why 2025 you ask?? Well that is the estimated year I will have re paid my student loan on a happier note i'll be 38 and be well established in my adulthood. I just finished watching the Masterpiece theater 4 part mini series Any Human Heart which is a book written by an author about a fake author via "his diaries." The Book/Film cover this whole man's life and they really hammer in the continuity and themes ones goes through throughout their life. So I allowed myself a temporary lapse in only focusing on the present to hypothesize about what my future existence will be like in 13 years. I will be an actress hopefully in features but also doing side indie projects where I can act my own script or direct/act like Zach Braft. I hope to have a partner someone who is sharing my life equally and always going on adventures with me. By 2025 I hope I have been to Alaska, Hawaii, Greece, Australia, Germany, and Japan and had my travel journals published into a book. I will have one love song, novel, and poem dedicated to me. I will have the kinds of friends who have been there for me almost 4 decades of my life and remember all the fights and the good times. My family will be even larger because I'm sure by that time all my girls cousins will have several kids. I will be living in one the beach towns out here so I can see the ocean every morning and fall asleep to crashing waves every night. Maybe I'll even be pregnant with one adopted child and a set of twins of my own. My home will be filled with pictures and treasures I have collected from around the world. My bed will have a frame and not be on the floor along with a closet that will contain all of my shoes. I will have inspired people to follow their dream and have entertained them in the process. I would have contributed to society in away that is beneficial and helpful to future generations. I will have lived my days truthfully and gratefully full of appreciation and wonder...sounds good to me 2025 here I come ~S~

Classic Hollywood in a Modern World

Maureen Aruther 1967

When people think of "Hollywood" certain iconic images come to mind. Of course the sign, the walk of fame, red carpets etc.. I also like to think of classic Hollywood where stars arrived to premieres in Rolls Royces and wore evening gloves al la Grace Kelly. There is a certain air of sophistication, elegance, and charm during that era. Over the holidays I had the pleasure of meeting this amazing women Maureen Rouben. Now she is very old but still has a smile and spark that will blow you away. I spent about an hour, which in the retail world is an eternity, talking to her about acting and life (I was smitten). She said literally the most mind blowing thing about acting and reality that I can't for the life of me even remember a part of now. It was like I was so engaged in the moment and intrigued by her stories I forgot all about all the Christmas chaos around me. When I got home I immediately googled her but came up blank. Last week she came in again with her assistant we chatted a bit more and she told me how concerned she is for the state of the world. It was interesting to me because it's not something that comes up often at work but I asked her what's on her mind so she told me. She almost had tears in her eyes at how she feels the world is going in such a dangerous direction. I also added her and the assistant to my Client book because we have to have clients (people who visit us at least twice) and they had shopped with me back in December (score for keeping my job). Now this part sounds creepy but I was doing it out of my general curiosity about her. When they go in your book you can then see basic information about someone like their address. This time when I went home I just typed her name and the area she lives in. I found numerous articles about her husbands death which also is turned mentioned her career. Like any true actress Maureen Rouben is her real name but not her "stage" name duh!!! it's Maureen Arthur. Well once I had that I could finally learn things about her career (thanks IMDB) like that until the 90's she was a steady working actress and singer most know for her role in How To Succeed In Business Without Really Trying. Wow I was floored! Clearly from the moment I met her I was enchanted so I assumed she once was someone not to mention most 70 years olds aren't still shopping in my store with assistants. I find her to be completely inspiring she is so old (how can you say that nicely??!?!!?) but yet her feistyness and spirit are so young. She is an entertainer through and through and always ends up saying something that cracks me up. I thought about this classic hollywood starlet and how she fits into this modern world. Too old to work but still full of life, concerned about the affairs of the world even if she's so frail she can barley walk. This juxtaposition just bewilders me and I am truly in awe. I want to be that amazing and that engaging at 78 I want to have a smile that says i'm strong and mischievous and eyes that could tell a million stories. Today was the third time I saw her. I brought up that I had looked into her career, her face lit up, the hollywood smile came out, and she giggled. I saw the passion in her face the same look and feeling I have when I preform. For a minute I made her happy by bringing up her cherished past it was such an honest sincere moment. It may seem silly but I feel like she's impacted my life in some way I can't quite describe... maybe it's inspiration~S~

Princess Delusions

http://www.cracked.com/funny-4485-classic-disney-movies/

Like most little American girls I was raised on Disney Princesses and barbies. I always wanted a "my size barbie" but because I was on heavy medication as a child I was too big for my size barbie and was devastated. All of my earlier birhdays were princess themed mostly Ariel because I thought she was adventurous and Belle because I thought she was sweet. I once had a conversation with girlfriends on why do we identify with certain princess because they have similar traits to us or because be want to be like them??? Then we discovered our favorite princess often had the same hair color we did. subliminal messaging especially for the young and impressionable is something I became very aware of as a teacher when the girl were singing Katy Perry's teenage dream and swinging around the swing set poles like they were strippers. As I mentioned in a previous post I always had this strong desire to go to France and speak French when I finally arrived there I really thought about where that came from and all of a sudden Beauty and the Beast popped into my head the song "Bonjour" particularly standing out. Maybe watching My Friend Totoro over and over again sparked my interest in Japanese culture??? I remember the first time I was taught about anything remotely feminist by my 9th grade English teacher Molly saying they called it "his story" for a reason. Since that day men at work signs have always angered me. In college I became more aware of social norms, schemas, gender stereotyping and all that good stuff you learn from a liberal psyc education. Honestly I can't help but feel a little jipped because I feel programmed to believe in a silly structure I don't actually want any part of. At 25 I feel compelled to be married and have kids but it's really in no way what I actually want in this point in my life by that nagging thought it still continuously there. there really are no good and healthy relationship depicted in these movies whatsoever but yet they appeal to something deep in our psyches. what is it??? do we really just want to be rescued by a handsome man???I like to think we as women are better then that but currently i've seen nothing but the contrary. I think at some point you have to make a choice...is this what I really want or do I want something more substantial?? ~S~

Styles of Shoes Styles of Men.

At work I often have a lot of time to just think since there is usually a point in the day when you have done all your tasks, talked to all you coworkers, and still there are no customers. Also the women's shoe department has the highest percentage of straight male men and it's right across from me so inevitably it comes to mind from time to time. Now I noticed each guy in the department has not only their own unique personality they also have a unique way of interacting with the customers and coworkers. Each a little different with their pros and cons but essentially all the same "product" at the end of the day- men.

The Gil- The Espadrille Wedge: is a shoe that is still exciting because it's high but it's also more comfy then a stiletto. It's cute and fun for a casual day out but it's not something you wear everyday. If you date a Gil you will have fun and flirt but there's no long term commitment.
The Dale- The Ballet Flat: is the least threatening shoe it's like the best friend of footwear. You can wear it anywhere with anybody sure it can be sexy but mostly you feel safe knowing you won't fall. If you date a Dale you may lack excitement but you will always have a solid footing.   
The Kevin- The stiletto heel: when you put on a pair you feel sexy your legs look long and fine and you are ready to party. Sure they are fantastic but only for about an hour then they kill and you would do just about anything to have any other shoe on your feet. If you date a Kevin it will be a roller coaster kick ass time until he gets bored and moves on to something sexier.
The Freddie- Classic Sneaker: you can't go wrong with a piece of footwear that is timeless, easy, and hassle free. If your looking for a no frills easy going relationship and on occasion a few compliments thrown in then date a Freddie.
The David- Patent Leather Pump: under the guise of being sexy patent leather usually looks a little cheap. You get a nice one liner and wink from time to time but that doesn't really end up satisfying you when all is said and done but maybe you don't want the commitment anyways??
The Don- The Bootie: Sure it sounds dirty(picture Sir Mix A lot) but it also sounds innocent (little babies wear booties right??) that's what you get when you date a Don you get both sides, someone who gives off the vibe of being tough and sexy but really is just a softie at heart.
The Matt-Knee High Boot: This is a classic stable item every women should own it's not only practical but sexy too. When you date a Matt it may seem simple and understated at first but it also comes with the surprise wow factor when you least expect it.. and it will blow your mind.

Now some women have a staple piece of footwear they never take off...some like to switch it up depending  on the occasion or their mood but ladies never forget there are as many men as there are styles of shoes....choose wisely! ~S~

Signs from Above

There are two kinds of people... those who are inclined to believe in the unknown miracles, UFOs, angels etc and then of course there are those who do not. These are people who tend to be of a scientific persuasion where fact rules and faith is faulty. I am a Buddhist so I believe in reincarnation and the continuation of souls after they have left "our world." It has now been 2 years since my Mom died and I have never once questioned her continuing presence in my life. After she first passed I asked her to come to me in dreams. After one horrific one where she was diligently taking care of me as I lay dying of cancer I asked her to stop it was too painful to feel her in my dreams and wake to find her gone. My sister and I asked her to send us hearts almost immediately my tea formed a heart on the window of my car. Of course you can look into something to much but sometimes it is just to much of a coincidence. The period of time between November and March is filled with holidays and memories which is challenging but then comes a break until the big one Mother's Day. You may have not noticed but its rapidly coming up and my stressed self has developed my eye twitch again. Yesterday I felt like I was given a gift. I came back to my area in the store and a friend asked me to take over selling a Michelle watch ( they range from 500-2,000 but you need to have a specific knowledge of sizes and assembly to even sell them) I gladly agreed knowing this would be a good sale. After a while I was able to "create" her perfect watch and then to my even greater joy she decided to open a store credit card (we can get fired if we don't open any and I was reminded the day before I had none for this month). So yay big sale yay credit card app then as we began the long daunting process of enrolling I noticed her maiden name was Patricia Walsh. My heart stopped I turned flush.. how many Patricia Walshs are there in the country?? (google search update 1,124 to be exact only 61 Shannon Cassidys though) I blurted out "My Mother's name is Patricia Walsh too" she smiled "Oh, isn't that nice." Sure it could be a mere coincidence but really the odds are still very much in my favor it was a much needed sign from my Mom a little burst of a joy in an otherwise exhausting work week. I felt connected to her for a moment like I do when I watch the sun through the trees at her grave ( I can't wait to do that in 6 weeks) mostly because I get to take time to acknowledge her in my current life not just the Mom she was but the Mom she is the way she still supports and encourages me even in death.

Top Ten Things To Remember If I'm Ever A Bride

So you know that saying always a bridesmaid never a bride my life is slowly becoming that cliche. Now don't get me wrong I have been honored to be a bridesmaid in every wedding I have been in. I have also learned a few things along the way. This is no way meant to be about anyone just my general feelings. Everyone swears they will remember these things but somehow it tends to get lost in the hussle, bussle, and headaches of planning a wedding.

1. I will NOT be a bridezilla (Definition: a bride-to-be who focuses so much on the event that she becomes difficult and obnoxious) just take a deep breath and relax it will be okay
2. Just because you've been programmed since birth that this is "your special day" where you get to be "a princess" and you get whatever you want does not make it reality- that is not life... ever... not even for one day... no matter how special the day is 
3. Marriage- A-a relationship in which two people have pledged themselves to each other  B- the social institution under which a man and woman establish their decision to live as husband and wife by legal commitments, religious ceremonies, etc. One of these sounds a lot better then the other doesn't it???
4. It's a wedding not a capitalist investment- in 10 years no will remember your center pieces probably not even you, or the name cards, save the money for important things or DIY
5. Love does not need to be proven with rings and a white dress it should be shown everyday through the commitment and actions of the partnership not just pledged one day out loud for your nearest and dearest 
6. Your guests are there to celebrate with you- shouldn't they be allowed to have some fun at your wedding too? bringing someone they care about, drinking, and light atmosphere are mandatory for guest pleasure let them have it they've spent a shitload of money on this night too
7. No one likes being in matching dresses and having to pay their hard earned money on something they will never wear again-seriously why are matching dresses still around???  
8. The whole event will fly by take time out to enjoy it be with the person you love and cherish it because tomorrow will just be another day- this day is special. Granted you will be Mrs so and so...that kinda makes the day after a little special too
9. Not everything will go exactly according to plan it is humanly impossible to control every minute detail so live in the moment... besides if you fall into the cake it will be a great story to tell the grandkids or submit to America's Funniest Home Videos
10. LOVE- Love is why you are doing this whole thing anyway. Make sure you are 110% sure and ready, that this is what you want, and you could not imagine life in any other way then this one- that this is the one person you want to share your life with every morning, every night, every sickness, and every moment. 

 

Giving Them What They Want VS What You Want to Give Them

So one of the few perks of my job is seeing people do what they do best...be people. I once had a conversation with a good friend about gift giving. Usually there is a disconnect in what you want to give the person vs what they actually want. He brought this concept up to me after one Christmas and I never really saw it's power until now. For instance I see this at least once a week in watches. A man comes in to buy a watch he says "I want her to have this one but I know she'd like this better.....I'll go with the first one" It never fails they almost always pick the one they want to give even when they know it's not the one the recipient will prefer!!!! It's crazy lol A man literally said to me "She likes plain simple things never wears any bling but I want to give her a bling watch because she deserves something pretty."Although that was a cute sentiment it's just going to upset the receiver because now she feels obliged to love it. Except when the L(lover) factor comes into play.This is how the L factor enters into the equation: They will like the item more because they really like the person who gave it to them. Now I have heard this as well "it's not really my style but my boyfriend picked it out and it was so thoughtful so I love it can you size it for me?" Bam you have now reversed the whole situation. You have turned an item they don't actually prefer into something they cherish damn you played your cards and it worked out well.... or "My boyfriend got me this watch it's totally not my style we broke up he just really doesn't understand me can I exchange this for one I actually like?" (true quote) and that folks is the risk you take. I hope you can learn something from these real life scenarios...next time you are buying a gift for someone you care about really think about what the result of your gift will be-not just the gift itself- if your girl prefers leather to diamonds maybe it's best if you just go with something you'll know she likes. It will save her from faking her happiness and me from dealing with the return :) follow my advice and you will be a champion gift giver. Don't forget it's always nice to get or give a gift just because :) ~S~